Mirror Mirror on the wall…

What do you see when you look in the mirror? Are you generally positive about your appearance or do you think ‘only if I was slimmer, prettier, little bit more toner etc’ or all together ‘I wish I was someone else?!’ I would be lying if I hadn’t felt the latter lot of the times in when I look in the mirror. Our insecurities, all the things that are wrong with our face, body, the way we act or something we said wrong, all seem to be somehow exaggerated when we look in the mirror. In the modern world that we live in, comparing ourselves and judging ourselves against others is often too easy. This goes deeper than just appearances; often our self-worth is based on what we see in the mirror, rightly or wrongly.

How you feel about yourself, and you can catch a glimpse of that when you look in the mirror, is the key your relationships and everything about you. In the personal development, self-improvement arena, there is more and more focus on using mirror as one of the tools to build self-esteem. One of the techniques I came across is by Robert Holden, who advocates standing in front of a mirror and using positive affirmations to overcome your ego and reach self-acceptance.

Over the years, I have come to the realisation that loving yourself, not just your appearance, but loving truly who you are one of the main keys to eternal happiness. This means forgiving yourself when you make a mistake, being kind to yourself when you look in the mirror and generally treating yourself like how you would treat the person who hold close to your heart. After does it not make sense to fill yourself with love before loving others?!

So starting today, why don’t you try being a little bit kinder to yourself when you see yourself in the mirror. Start with little acknowledgments; little things you like about yourself and perhaps an affirmation or two; ‘I am loved’ or ‘I am enough’. Being kind to yourself in the mirror does not take too long or need much effort, but results can actually be quite surprising.

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Hardest lesson of all… Patience…

  
I have recently become a hot yoga junkie and over the weekend one of the things my yoga teacher said struck a chord with me. I was in the middle of the Fixed Firm pose ( you sit on your knees, compressing the knee joints) which is often my most difficult pose, one that always find it difficult to practice, let alone master, so at this point I often give up and sit down. At this point, my yoga teacher said ‘ you have built up resistance over 30 years in your knees and it may take couple of years for your knees to let it go, so be patient, if you don’t get it immediately’.  That’s when it stuck me; our minds are the same, we have build up years of habits and certain level of resistance to change, but once we made up our minds to change, we expect results almost immediately. When results don’t know up immediately we get disheartened and give up. 

Nowadays I try to challenge myself  when I am at the point of giving up; when what I desire doesn’t happen, even though I am doing all the positive thinking in the world and using all the tools that I know of, I think to myself,’patience’.

At the very least, next time I do yoga, I am going to give the Fixed Firm pose a real go and be patient with myself if I can’t master it; it will come to me over time. On the same basis, I know I can manifest what I want in my life, but I shouldn’t expect a neat timetable. Somethings show up in my life a lot quickly than others. The things that are slow to show up often means that there in a mental block in my subconscious, it’s just going to take a little bit of time to get around the block! 

“Patience is not the ability to wait, but the ability to to keep a good attitude while waiting” – Joyce Meyer 

 

Law of Attraction – Back to Basics

Law of attraction is the notion that we live in an energy based universe and universe works on the basis of ‘like attracts like’ and therefore working of our inner mind or our sub-conscious (energy we project out) has a direct impact on the working of the universe (energy we receive back). So if our thoughts, feelings and general attitudes are positive, i.e. we are sending out positive vibes to the universe, we will attract more positive experiences in our life. This also works vice versa, i.e. you send out negative vibes and you attract more negative experiences.

A universe that responds to our thoughts may sound far-fetched but some of the recent scientific discoveries in quantum physics and cosmology are by far stranger. The double slit experiment in particle physics tells us that at a sub-atomic level, the act of observation makes the particles behave differently (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DfPeprQ7oGc – DR Quantum’s version of the experiment).  While in cosmology, Cosmologists have theorised that 95% of the universe is made up of dark energy and dark matter which by far has stranger properties that matter, which is the only thing we know a little about (http://hubblesite.org/hubble_discoveries/dark_energy/de-what_is_dark_energy.php).

Although, phenomenon like double slit experiment or dark energy does not necessarily prove the existence of a universe which is influenced by our sub-conscious mind, but it has certainly encouraged me to be more opened minded as there is a lot of things in the universe that we do not understand yet.

With an open mind if we accept that the law of attraction exists, then we must accept that we are creating our own reality. I don’t mean that in a metaphorical ‘motivational-quote’ kind of a way, but in a literal way. If our thoughts are influencing the universe (by default that means the environment around us), then we are creating the circumstances in our life with our thoughts, intentionally or not. Welcome to your own personal Matrix world!

Law of Attraction – Mind Tools

There are many leading thought experts and facilitators out there who devise new tools and techniques to harness this knowledge so that as individuals and as a society we can live a life for the better. Here are some of the techniques used:

  • Creative visualisation – This essentially focuses our minds to create picture of our ideal future and imagine living it at the present moment.
  • Living life though Gratitude – being thankful for what you have and by doing so attracting more situations and circumstances that we will have to be grateful for.
  • Affirmation statements – stating exactly what you want in life but using present tense so your inner mind knows exactly what you want
  • Mirror work – what does a mirror do? It reflects; a bit like the Law Of universe. So mirror work essentially an opportunity to work on yourself and your thoughts in front of a mirror.
  • Practicing Mindfulness – Being aware of our thoughts and feelings (without judgement) is the first step in understanding and controlling our minds. By practicing mindfulness you get to know your thought patterns and so that any negative patterns can be changed.
  • Practicing Meditation – Similar to mindfulness, practicing mediation, we are able to quieten our minds and able to observe our thoughts. Additionally in a meditative state, we are more likely to access our sub-conscious mind and therefore able to influence our thoughts at a deeper level.

Law of Attraction – Resistance is Futile

There are loads of reasons why many people feel that law of attraction tools don’t work; or law of attraction does not work entirely. The problem is that if you think law of attraction doesn’t exist, well then the chances are that all the circumstances that show up in your life will convince you that it doesn’t exist. So to a certain extent, a leap of faith is needed; hence why law of attraction is often thought of as a spiritual practice.

Another pitfall is that your thoughts, feelings, beliefs and attitudes must be aligned to what you are trying to attract in your life. For example, you are trying to attract wealth in your life, but in the back of your mind you think money is the root of all evil, so it is very likely you will not succeed, after all you don’t want evil in your life do you?! This is where psychology techniques come into play to have self-awareness; know yourself and know what feels right and what doesn’t.  When you want to attract something that you fully believe in then it will come naturally, it will not be a struggle.

The classic reason why law of attraction doesn’t work for people is fear. We as human being are driven and to some extent protected by fear; it comes to us as naturally as love does. Problem is when you are fearful that you are not going to get what you desire more than the love you feel for your desire then it is likely that the fear will win out. You will not get what your heart desires. Let go of that fear, especially in the manifesting process; believe you will get what you want and believe it with your whole heart and mind.

As a Practitioner of law of attraction for many years (some intentionally and some unintentionally!), knowing the law and applying it are two different things. I still suffer from resistance when I am trying to attract things I want in my life, but it is getting easier to work out what my resistance is. It does take time for you to work out what you really want and sometimes it feels like it takes time for the universe to deliver your want and you know what, that is okay! Time gives you that chance to reflect and really work out what you want.  Sometimes it turns out that something that you wanted for a long time is not something that you actually needed. So that’s where the saying come from; ‘be careful what you wish for’; because your wishes do come true!